Six Feet Under
by OhSoSlightlyTwisted
Summary: Grell/Undertaker. There will be yaoi! Hardcore lemon yaoi XD This is my first EVER time writing fanfiction, so I'm very sorry if you find it to be out of character or poorly written. The chapters will be short, that's the way I roll. :3
1. Chapter 1

It was a bitterly cold, dark night at the Undertaker's funeral directory. A thin layer of dust covered the inside of the building; its walls, its ceilings, its floors, and the Undertaker's possessions hadn't escaped from the settling dirt either, the skulls and candelabras and elegantly crafted coffins were all as dusty as the Undertaker himself, who, at that time, was sleeping in one of his coffins, as he did every night. Low, muffled laughs could be heard entwined within the snores that were parting from behind the wooden lid of the coffin. All was peaceful in a macabre fashion.

And then suddenly, it all started to happen. A flustered flurry of striking crimson burst through the doors of the Undertaker's building, with a loud cry of "OK, I give up! You have to help me, as creepy as you are!" in a most infuriatingly whining tone. The Undertaker however, slept on in the warmth of his coffin, a small drool bubble forming at the base of his wide grin.

The interruption (if you could really call it that, due to The Undertaker's odd ability to sleep through practically anything) had come from none other than the flamboyant shinigami, known as Grell Sutcliffe. He was standing in the doorway, one hand on his bony hip, the other pressed up against his forehead in despair, a melodramatic expression of worry on his face. "You see, for far too many nights now, I've been alone and-." Grell stopped his speech and his expression of overdramatic despair turned into one of annoyance. "Hey, Undertaker! Where are you?! I have absolutely _ghastly _news!" Grell whined, throwing his head upwards and flicking his hand outwards into the musty air, his long coat flicking over Grell's slim legs as he moved. Grell pouted, realising that the Undertaker wasn't listening to him. In fact, Grell didn't even know if the Undertaker would be home at such a late hour. Grell sighed desperately, once again thrusting the back of his hand to his forehead. "Oh, what a trial my life is!" he proclaimed, before stopping to take in his surroundings for the first time. Grell shivered. "Eugh. How on earth can anyone live in a place like this?" he questioned, to an old, cracked skull that sat atop a pile of old withered leather books, as he picked it up and promptly placed it back down again. Grell ran one of his slender, gloved fingers across an old photograph and winced at the amount of dirt that was wiped off of it. 'Bloody hell, this whole place is disgusting in the most eerie of ways!' he trilled, sticking his tongue out in disgust. His body froze as Grell suddenly heard an odd noise. It was a rasping, groaning sound that seemed to be accompanied by...laughter? It was coming from a coffin at the farthest end of the room, shadowed underneath stacks of jars, Grell was sure of it. Whimpering, Grell began to step backwards, but before he could escape, the coffin's door began to creak open and it slid to the floor with the sickening clanging sound of wood against metal. The Undertaker peered through his hair and yawned, grinning. "Grell! You came just in time to see me wake up from my nap, eh?" the Undertaker cooed. "And I-" he began, but was cut off by a large book suddenly being thrown at his face. "DIE YOU HORRID ZOMBIE!" Grell yelped, throwing anything he could grab at the coffin. The Undertaker sheltered himself by his long sleeves, and cried out to Grell. "Grell, it's me! Please stop throwing those books at me, most of them aren't even mine!" "Oh" replied Grell, blushing and stopping his rampage. "Sorry" he continued, still shaken up. Grell, shaking, leant against a coffin to steady himself, and promptly fell straight into it.


	2. Chapter 2

Several minutes later, Grell was being 'treated' to some of the Undertaker's bone shaped cookies and suspicious looking tea. Draped around him was a roughly stitched blanket, which felt so heavy against the shinigami's skinny shoulders. The Undertaker sat opposite Grell, grinning at him wildly. "Ehehe...you're lucky you didn't break that coffin, it's made from solid oak. Expensive, you know..." the Undertaker explained, to Grell's obvious disgust. "I don't care how much it's worth! Do you know how frightened I was?! This whole place is horribly creepy." Grell replied, whimpering at a jar that was near him, which seemed to contain several human organs. The Undertaker chuckled, wrapping a hand around the jar with his bony fingers to remove it from Grell's sight. He placed it on a high shelf, and as he was reaching up, spoke to Grell. "May I ask why you came to pay me a visit at such an early hour of the morning? Not that I mind, it's just...isn't it more common to visit people during the daytime?" the Undertaker questioned, smiling curiously at Grell before sitting back down again and running his tongue along a biscuit. Grell raised an eyebrow. "Well, I could ask you why you were taking a nap in a coffin! And shouldn't you be sleeping, not napping?! Just buy damn a bed!" Grell rambled on, before being silenced by one of the Undertaker's long, black nails being pushed to his lips. "Ehehehehe...so Grell's trying to divert from answering why he's here, hmm?" the Undertaker grinned. Scowling, Grell pouted at the Undertaker and pushed his hand away. "No! It's just....difficult to phrase. You see, it's such a _traumatic _situation!" Grell exclaimed, leaping up and letting the blanket drop from his scrawny shoulders. Before the Undertaker could react, Grell carried on. "You see, I've just been so _lonely, _of late!" Grell moaned, clutching a nearby book to his heart to demonstrate his strong feelings. "My heart _aches _for that scrumptious demon, known as Sebastian!" he cried, moaning out Sebastian's name longingly. Grell twirled and sighed, placing a hand to his heart. "But alas, he does not share these feelings. He cares more about that pompous Earl of his!" Grell proclaimed, scowling. "And this! This is where _you _can help me!" Grell smiled, pointing towards the Undertaker with one of his long fingers. The Undertaker grinned. This was starting to sound interesting. "How can I be of service to you then?" he smirked.

Grell retracted his finger and looked at the Undertaker darkly. "You seem to know everything about anyone. You have so much knowledge, it's...it's creepy. I want Sebastian to fall in love with me, and you are going to help me do it!" Grell said with a low, authoritative tone to his usually high-pitched voice. "And why would I do anything of the sort, ehehe?" the Undertaker asked, grinning and teasing the shinigami. Grell's face fell and he began to whine. "B-but...I-I'll pay you! Oh. Wait." Grell sat, pondering for a second, remembering the Undertaker's great dislike of the Queen's money. "Then I'll pay you in...laughs or whatever it is that you want. You want me to tell you a joke, right?" Grell asked, his face smiling and full of anticipation. "No" the Undertaker replied, a faint smirking smile forming on his lips. "DAMNIT! What _do _you want, you old creep?!" yelled Grell, close to throttling the Undertaker in his hands. Much to Grell's annoyance, the Undertaker got up and began to stroll casually back and forth; circling Grell, ducking his head towards Grell's face. He was so close that Grell could smell the tea leaves on his breath. Impatiently, Grell began to tap his slender fingers on the pile of books next to him, glaring at the Undertaker. "Love isn't that easy, you know...ehehe..." chuckled the Undertaker, whilst stroking his fingers across a jar containing a bloody heart. "It requires a deep mystical bond...one cannot simply..." The Undertaker paused his speech to flop himself across Grell's lap and stare upwards into Grell's eyes. "_Fall _into love so easily!" he finished, grinning widely at Grell. Groaning, Grell pushed the Undertaker off him and sighed. "Will you help me or nooot?" he whined, pouting sadly. Dusting himself off, the Undertaker got up and looked at Grell deeply, swaying. "Sebastian will never fall for you" he said, practically singing the words. An infuriated Grell leapt at the Undertaker, almost knocking him to the floor. "And why not?!" Grell cried, in a tone that was supposed to convey anger, but by the time it had left Grell's lips, it sounded more like the desperate meow of a kitten, eager for its milk. The Undertaker grinned, exposing his pearly and almost pointed teeth. "Sebastian by most counts is a demon, eh? A dark creature...with a dark nature." The Undertaker continued to grin, but in a sadistic manner. "You're too bright for him. He needs a tainted soul that has been through as much darkness as he has." Continued the Undertaker, by which time Grell was almost in tears. "B-but....! Teach me how to be all dark and creepy and weird!" cried Grell desperately, clinging to the Undertaker's beads which hung loosely around his long neck. The Undertaker placed one of his thin hands on Grell's soft hair. "Grell...ehehe...you amuse me with how stubborn you are!" he said, smiling. "Just tell me how to be...'dark'!" Grell growled, clutching the Undertaker's beads harder. "Weeellll...." the Undertaker started. "Looking around, I think we've already begun." Grell glanced around at the macabre sight of the funeral directory and gulped, shivering. The Undertaker just grinned, chuckling softly.


End file.
